#4. In fine print on the last page of The Guiness Book of World Records, it notes that all world records are held by chuck norris and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
#3. When the boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for chuck norris.
#2. Chuck norris is currently suing nbc, claiming "law & order" are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
#1. Chuck norris's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. EVER
#10. When chuck norris does push-ups he doesn't push himself up. He pushes the earth down.
#9. There are no steroids in baseball. Only players chuck norris has breathed on.
#8. Rather than being birthed like a normal child, chuck norris d...ecided to punch his way out of his mother's womb.
#7. Chuck norris once shot down a german fighter plane with his finger by yelling "bang!".
#6. Chuck norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
#5. When chuck norris sends in taxes, he sends in blank forms and includes only a picture of himself crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has never had to pay taxes. EVER
