Uwe Boll and terrible video game movies. [Archive]

RU Joe

02-09-2010, 07:34 AM

This is a thread about Uwe Boll
http://loot-ninja.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/uwe-boll.jpg

the director who consistently makes horrible movie adaptations of video games
- and yet still gets contracts to make more!

Some great games I know which he failed to adapt to film:

Alone in the Dark - dark is right! I could hardly see anything.
They really should have stuck with the haunted house theme.
http://www.coverbrowser.com/image/playstation-games/19-1.jpg

Bloodrayne - not a great career move for Ben Kingsley or Kristianna Loken.
This is Uwe's worst offense, in my opinion.
http://s61.radikal.ru/i172/0811/56/2d3a7351a66b.jpg

Silent Hill - where are the nurse demons? I felt like I was watching The Wicker Man - with fog.
http://image3.examiner.com/images/blog/wysiwyg/image/Silent_Hill_2.jpg

I believe these movies have done no good for the games industry as a whole.
People who have not played these great games may not ever want to should they happen to see Uwe's movie version beforehand.

Then there is the real question in my mind -
why did they let this guy make more than one movie adaptation?
Did they not see the other shows he had made?

IN general I have one major complaint about these and all game movies:

when they adapt a game into a movie, why do they change so many things - is the original concept not good enough?

(On that matter Uwe isn't the only one who did that: Max Payne was nearly unrecognizable in the characters' movie personas and the addition of the 'Dark Valkyries' as seen by Valkyr users.)

My point is that the game itself was good enough to sell the billions of copies which in turn allowed for the making of the movie adaptation, so what gives?
Just once I would like to see a literal translation of game to film with no changes.

Certainly Uwe isn't going to provide this, but if you want to criticize him in person I understand that he extends an open invitation to meet him in the boxing ring.
:beat-up:

StarfoxFan2009

02-09-2010, 07:47 AM

Uwe Boll seriously needs to get out of film making. He has yet to make a excellent movie. I'd take him anyday in boxing.

RU Joe

02-09-2010, 07:59 AM

SFF2009:
I'd take him anyday in boxing.
So you think his boxing career is unsteady too, eh?
I get the feeling that he fights better than he films.
Perhaps we should hope so for his sake.

StarfoxFan2009

02-09-2010, 08:02 AM

He's sure as heck no Iron Mike Tyson or golden boy Oscar De La Hoya

joz

02-09-2010, 08:13 AM

I had no idea who he was until now. I never saw Alone in the Dark nor Bloodrayne, but Silent Hill was a decent movie. It's also the only game I've played of three.

RU Joe

02-09-2010, 08:23 AM

JZ3000:
Silent Hill was a decent movie. It's also the only game I've played of three.
If you played the game, then weren't you disappointed not to have seen a whole 'hospital' section in the movie?
That was half of the game's appeal for me.

Also, I wonder why James never made it as the lead character; but then I already said I am in favor of literal translation.

joz

02-09-2010, 08:35 AM

Yeah it would have been nice to see all of the game in the movie, but then that would make for a very long movie. I never really finished the game iether, so I don't remember too much about it. I had rented it back in the day and didn't get to finish it on time. I did like how the creepy babies turned out.

Demon-Mask

02-09-2010, 05:08 PM

His movies make me cry, but not in the sad movie way, the why the hell did I just watch this crap way.

RU Joe

02-09-2010, 07:21 PM

JZ3000:
These games are on their way out it seems as I have been getting games for Gamecube/PS2 for 5-15 dollars CAN.
This is the perfect time to go find the ones you never got to finish -
(pawnshops still have them at decent prices, but watch out for game specialty stores and flea markets as they try to sell them as 'rare antiques' and the price goes way up.)
and Silent Hill 2 has a worthy ending, in my opinion.

I can't say I remember creepy babies too vividly, but I sure do remember that haunted prison - it's just as scary as the hospital or perhaps even more so.

DM:
I am a believer, when it comes to new movie titles I'm interested in.
Looking forward to a new theatrical experience I suspend disbelief and allow the movie to take me on a ride.

It becomes disappointing when the premise of the movie is betrayed by inconsistencies, changes to the characters and storyline which make no logical sense, and cinematography so dark it is impossible to distinguish what you are looking at on the screen even in a dark room.

It sounds to me like you fall into this trap the same way I and a lot of other people do.
The difference with me is that I seem to have a need to see these movies for myself, even after other people warn me how awful they are.

Demon-Mask

02-10-2010, 05:13 PM

I do the same thing, no matter how bad reviews are I still need to see the horrors myself.

Mareeps

02-10-2010, 05:46 PM

he makes such bad movies because of a german loop hole where if his movies don't profit, he makes money.

or so i heard

Demon-Mask

02-10-2010, 10:08 PM

Sounds reasonable.

RU Joe

02-10-2010, 10:22 PM

DM:
I do the same thing, no matter how bad reviews are I still need to see the horrors myself.
I've found through the years that I have unusual tastes when it comes to entertainment, and a lot of the popular 'classics' are movies I don't like at all.

That, coupled with the fact that the critic's reviews (not the Nostalgia Critic or Your Nostalgia Chick, though) often pooh - poohed movies that I really enjoy helped me to realize that just because they say it's bad doesn't mean it is absolutely.

I like a lot of movies that critics say are bad, and in fact I really enjoy bad movies for the most part - weird as it seems - I like Mortal Kombat, Street Fighter, Super Mario Bros. and all of those once in a while.
I place them in the same category as Kung - Fu movies.
Sometimes they're so bad it makes them good.

Perhaps it's because I'm not a nit - picker when it comes to the details of the shows, but Uwe Boll's shows are hard not to nit - pick, I find, due to the fact that he has the technology to follow the original storylines and settings but seems to refuse to do so.
The games he adapts to film aren't 8 - bit nintendo games, either.

BM12344:
he makes such bad movies because of a german loop hole where if his movies don't profit, he makes money.

I remember hearing the same thing, and I wonder how he pulled the same scam more than once.
Not that it's a real 'scam' in the classic sense but really, if you were that body paying out money to a failed film maker such as Uwe, wouldn't you eventually question allowing him to do it again?

I think I would say:
'Sorry mister, your last projects were failures and it's starting to look like you do it deliberately to take advantage of this loophole.
No more money for you.'

Dudebro

02-10-2010, 11:08 PM

I believe we've discussed this here before but I can't find the topic. Either way it seems like you guys haven't heard of the petition.
Stop Dr. Uwe Boll Petition (http://www.petitiononline.com/RRH53888/petition.html)
It's got 352,059 signatures and growing. Not that it really matters and it won't change anything but it's a start.

fenrir1887

02-11-2010, 08:58 AM

I agree. Still, I hate Boll's efforts as a director. He'd have ruined a movie like Tomb Raider and made it a true flop in the sense of the word. I am so glad he wasn't behind that movie.

Tails

02-11-2010, 09:52 AM

Looks like Favre in the first pic.

Demon-Mask

02-11-2010, 02:56 PM

RU Joe

02-11-2010, 06:22 PM

If Uwe Boll directed Tomb Raider:

http://discuss.itacumens.com/gallery/1457_15_01_09_8_57_55.jpeg

No offense to Rowan Atkinson.
I'm not so sure about Angelina Jolie.

Dudebro

02-11-2010, 06:26 PM

That picture is pretty disturbing.

xfighter1138

02-18-2010, 12:58 PM

Uwe Boll didn't direct Silent Hill, some guy from France did.

I've only seen Postal and House of the Dead.

Postal is just proof that Dave Foley is a washup these days.

House of the Dead is alright.

RU Joe

02-18-2010, 04:06 PM

XF1138:
Uwe Boll didn't direct Silent Hill, some guy from France did.
I didn't know that.
Well, some guy in France seems like he never saw the game since James and the nurse demons were not in the movie.

It's like a burger without the pickle - good, but not the same.

http://www.foodfacts.info/blog/uploaded_images/tall-hamburger.jpghttp://www.lakesideamusementpark.com/scooby_shaggy_poster.jpg

fenrir1887

02-25-2010, 12:30 PM

Uwe Boll is still a director with no talent. If I could get my hands on him with other people who hate him, I'd lynch him. I hate his movies!

samejamesbond

02-25-2010, 01:57 PM

Oh yeah Bloodrayne I remember that film.

http://www.brawlsnapshots.com/snapshots/77635.jpg

Demon-Mask

02-25-2010, 07:33 PM

Oh yeah Bloodrayne I remember that film.

All I remember is the sex scene, which I will not post here for obvious reasons. That part was okay, It's not like I'd look for it though.

RU Joe

02-25-2010, 09:49 PM

F1887:
Uwe Boll is still a director with no talent. If I could get my hands on him with other people who hate him, I'd lynch him. I hate his movies!
I'm certain you mean that as a figure of speech.
If you want blood, he has offered an opportunity to get some in a boxing match.
So far as hating his movies, I guess I do too, but they're the only video game movies there are so that's just as good as it gets for now.

Due to their hideous nature you can get them for about 5 dollars each if you need to see games movies so in that way it's kind of Ok.

DM:
All I remember is the sex scene, which I will not post here for obvious reasons. That part was okay, It's not like I'd look for it though.
OH BOY, do I ever remember that scene.
Alright, I believe most fans of the game think Bloodrayne is hot and no doubt have had some impure thoughts about that character = this is only natural.

I think Uwe put that scene in the movie to acknowledge her sex appeal, but the timing of the scene and particularly its L E N G T H was not only awkward, but also embarrassing the way it never seemed to end.
http://masbury.files.wordpress.com/2006/09/embarrassed-chimpanzee_tim-davis.jpg
My point is that it's a movie about Bloodrayne, not some ARRRRR rated soft porn.

Sorry, but it's the truth.

Demon-Mask

02-25-2010, 11:09 PM

I know, had the movie not been about Bloodrayne, it would have been a bit better, but I am a gamer first, so the movie was terrible.

StarfoxFan2009

02-26-2010, 09:51 AM

I bet Uwe Boll gets all of his TKOs by bribing someone to fall. I wouldn't do that even if it was for a thousand dollars. I would give him a flurry of punches and then let's see how he does (practices by shadowboxing)

fenrir1887

02-27-2010, 03:08 PM

I agree. I'd pay someone like Vasily Valuev, a current titleholder, to fight Boll.

samejamesbond

02-27-2010, 03:11 PM

I'd hire Mike Tyson.

If you're deaf, you can't direct.

fenrir1887

02-27-2010, 03:18 PM

Or, better yet, pit him against Chuck Liddell in the Octagon.

KingRanech

03-01-2010, 09:12 PM

Uwe Boll seriously needs to get out of film making. He has yet to make a excellent movie. I'd take him anyday in boxing.

Hey, uh..i agree with you and all just..do you mind not sharing your furry signature with everyone? I never really saw anthromorphic foxes as "cute" or "beatiful" but, hey! who am I to judge? Final word: please. Please. reconsider. kthxbye:love-over::party::angel::foot-in-mouth::sheep:

---------- Post added at 11:12 PM ---------- Previous post was at 11:12 PM ----------

Hey, uh..i agree with you and all just..do you mind not sharing your furry signature with everyone? I never really saw anthromorphic foxes as "cute" or "beautiful" but, hey! who am I to judge? Final word: please. Please. reconsider. kthxbye:love-over::party::angel::foot-in-mouth::sheep:

Infinite quote loop!~:sheep:

Dudebro

03-01-2010, 10:19 PM

I agree the anthropomorphic sig is kind of disturbing but it's not breaking any rules.

Demon-Mask

03-04-2010, 06:12 PM

Hey, uh..i agree with you and all just..do you mind not sharing your furry signature with everyone? I never really saw anthromorphic foxes as "cute" or "beatiful" but, hey! who am I to judge? Final word: please. Please. reconsider. kthxbye:love-over::party::angel::foot-in-mouth::sheep:

If that was directed at me: I don't usually like furries either, I just like this one, but as soon as I find something to replace it, I will consider.

Would you mind not sharing your chatspeak with me then?
If it was not directed at me,. then please speak up, as I like my signature as is.

RU Joe

03-04-2010, 11:27 PM

Hi guys.
It's fun to see so many people vote 'Boll's head should roll!'.
I can imagine the Queen of Hearts saying {while watching one of his movies}:

I've seen enough.
http://www.alice-in-wonderland.net/alicepic/disney-movie/queen-of-hearts-8.jpg

OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!!
http://mnpublius.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/queen-of-hearts-7.jpg

Dudebro

03-04-2010, 11:59 PM

If that was directed at me: I don't usually like furries either, I just like this one, but as soon as I find something to replace it, I will consider.

Would you mind not sharing your chatspeak with me then?
If it was not directed at me,. then please speak up, as I like my signature as is.
No he meant Starfoxfan.

fenrir1887

03-05-2010, 02:18 PM

You know, I don't like being judgmental most of the time. I think it's kind of hard to ask that of SFF2K9, considering you see it all over the place. I've seen far more disturbing sigs, mostly done by my mother and her groups.

Demon-Mask

03-05-2010, 05:01 PM

No he meant Starfoxfan.
Is mine disturbing though, if it is, it wouldn't hurt one bit to change it, but only if it bugs people.

Dudebro

03-06-2010, 02:17 AM

I'm not bothered by either. As long as people don't try posting nude/porno furry stuff I'm cool with it.

Demon-Mask

03-06-2010, 02:21 AM

Okay, just checking, while I've always been okay with offending people, this is a case were I'd rather not.

It's not that I try to offend people, I just don't try particularly hard to not offend them.

Dudebro

03-06-2010, 02:32 AM

Offending people is fine as long as you keep it within the site rules. I know that works against the concept of offending people but there's some wiggle room.

Demon-Mask

03-06-2010, 02:35 AM

I know, I don't mean online, mostly it's a thing that happens in person.

Dudebro

03-06-2010, 02:37 AM

I have a tendency to offend people by accident. I can't help myself, I talk too much.

Demon-Mask

03-06-2010, 02:41 AM

Sometimes I say too much, and other times I say too little.

I also speak to everyone the same regardless of gender, age, position or race, so people accuse me of being sexist or racist, but by not speaking to them differently, I am not being racist, I am simply not holding their race higher.

Dudebro

03-06-2010, 02:47 AM

Yeah I'm the same way but you have to balance it or you'll end up causing problems that didn't need to happen.

fenrir1887

03-06-2010, 08:39 PM

I tend to offend with what I say too. But, then again I don't often do it here and probably not without second thoughts.

Demon-Mask

03-06-2010, 11:08 PM

Yeah I'm the same way but you have to balance it or you'll end up causing problems that didn't need to happen.
I've been working on it more.

@fenrir: you don't generally get offensive, the only thing you do that ever bugs me, is occasionally post things that require me to be a logic cop, IE: contradictions and posts to say you'd rather not post on the subject.
You'll find that I am very hard to offend.

fenrir1887

03-07-2010, 07:02 AM

I think I may have found a way to stop the whole posting contradictions, but trust me you might think I'm weird. Which is not a bad thing since what I have in mind is fairly weird.

Tails

03-07-2010, 07:14 AM

Don't worry on that account~

fenrir1887

03-07-2010, 07:16 AM

I do. If I make references to things that are long-running between my mother and I that you may need explaining about, I don't contradict myself as badly. Besides, some of that chatter between us is highly amusing.

Mareeps

03-07-2010, 11:04 AM

Uwe Boll is the Active Enterprises of movies.

Neutral

03-07-2010, 11:35 AM

Uwe Boll is the Active Enterprises of movies.
Yeah, he is very entrepreneuring....

DrunkN

03-07-2010, 02:43 PM

Uwe Boll is the Active Enterprises of movies.
They HAVE had good games you know...

Neutral

03-07-2010, 04:17 PM

I have a tendency to offend people by accident. I can't help myself, I talk too much.
I know what you mean, I also have a tendency to offend people... by talking to little. Everything is a balance.

Mareeps

03-07-2010, 05:25 PM

They HAVE had good games you know...
Active Enterprises made Action 52 and Cheetahmen2.

Those are not good games.

Dudebro

03-07-2010, 08:07 PM

I do. If I make references to things that are long-running between my mother and I that you may need explaining about, I don't contradict myself as badly.
It's usually better if you avoid inside jokes when posting on forums. If you have to explain why it's funny or who the people are then it's not going to get a good reaction and it'll probably just be awkward.

DrunkN

03-07-2010, 08:17 PM

Active Enterprises made Action 52 and Cheetahmen2.

Those are not good games.
Yes, because when you list the bad it completely voids the existence of the good.

fenrir1887

03-07-2010, 11:26 PM

Okay, but I do need to say this. If I get lost somewhere down the road, I'd rather get clued in than left in the dark. Oh, and I'm dropping the subject so as not to come across nit-picky.

Dudebro

03-08-2010, 12:24 AM

Okay, but I do need to say this. If I get lost somewhere down the road, I'd rather get clued in than left in the dark. Oh, and I'm dropping the subject so as not to come across nit-picky.
I'm not sure I follow, what are you trying to say here?

fenrir1887

03-08-2010, 12:25 PM

Okay, on some forums, I get in when you guys are in the middle of a discussion, so I have no idea what you guys are talking about. I would probably rather ask what I missed as far as discussion then not know what exactly to talk about. Sometimes we get off on a different subject than thge forum suggests.

Dudebro

03-09-2010, 02:09 AM

So are you saying we should be asking you to explain your personal stories about people we will probably never meet? Sorry but that's not how this works. If someone is interested they'll ask but otherwise the burden is on you to make sure the reader knows what you're talking about. Either way it's up to you I'm just giving you some advice.

If you have trouble following a discussion on a forum you can go back to previous pages and read what you missed. If you still don't understand what's going on feel free to ask.

Sorry if I totally missed your point but that's what I took from your post.